Forever and for always
by Valya
Summary: A StevieAlex fic
1. On the run

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything to do with McLeod's Daughters. I'm just a big fan and in my free time I'm writing a story about them. Non profit is made. I, however, do own James.

**Feedback: **Yes, please. Constructive criticism is valued

**Author's note: **This is my first fanfic that I'm writing in English and also my first McLeod's Daughters fic. Since English is not my mother tongue there'll surely be mistakes in it. If there are very serious mistakes in it I'd be happy if you could tell me.

I hope I can finish this story but I don't know if I've got enough fantasy for that!

I don't have a title yet. I hope something comes to my mind soon.

Well, I hope you enjoy reading it!

**Chapter 1**

She watched as James Miller, her stepfather, sent her mother flying across the kitchen. This time she actually saw it. She saw her mother falling on the floor knocking her head against a chair. She knew her mother wasn't going to fight back because this would make everything worse and her mother knew he could kill her in an instant if he wanted to and then he'd kill her daughter.  
It's been going on like this since she could remember. She didn't know if there had been a time in which her stepfather hadn't been a man who battered his wife.

So far she had never seen her stepfather battering her mum. So far she had only heard him yelling at her mother and later tehr would always follow the sound of things falling to the floor and the smothered crying of her mother. So far she had only heard what was going on in her home but today she needed to see it. She had come downstairs because she had to see with her very eyes what this bastard was doing to her mother and she had to do something to end it.

She couldn't stand to watch this dreadful scene any longer as James dragged her mother up again by her beautiful hair. She turned around and as she sneaked back upstairs she hard her mother whimpering and swearing that she would never talk against him.

Back in her room she let herself fall into her bed. She lay there for a sec but then she got up in a hurry. The last few weeks an idea had been forming in her head. A plan that would get her mother and herself out of the hell they both were living in. She had already some stuff packed in her rucksack which she now pulled up from behind her bed and placed it on a chair next to her desk.  
Then she opened the bottom drawer of her desk. It was the drawer in which she stored the things that had great value to her. She kept her treasures there. Like a picture of her mother and her. It was taken a long time ago … in times when her mother was still laughing even though her eyes glanced sadly into the camera.  
She now took this picture and put it the into her rucksack. She couldn't leave it behind. She needed this picture as much as the few clothes that she was going to take with her because this picture gave her hope that one day everything would be different and that her mother would smile again.  
She also took the money that she had saved. When she started to save it she wanted to use it to buy herself a horse one day but now she'd need it for soemthing greater. She'd need it to free herself and to free her mother. This was much more important than any horse. She also took out a folded piece of paper. She didn't a look at it but put it in the pocket of her jeans immediately. This sheet was propably the most important thing she owned right now. She mustn't lose it.  
She took her jacket and was now ready to leave.

The noise downstairs had ceased. It was now deadly quiet. She didn't hear a noise as she slowly made her way down the stairs. Her stepfather was probably getting drucnk in some low dive. _Great_ she thought. _This makes everything easier._

She reached the last step and was just about to sneak out of the house as she suddenly noticed her mother lying on the floor in a pool of blood hat streamed down her head.

"Mom!" she dropped her rucksack and hurried to he unconscious figure on the floor. "Mom! Wake up!"_ This can't be real!_ she thought. _Not now that I've found a way to get us out of here!_

Suddenly she saw her mother as she slowly moved her head and she realized that it might not yet be over. Her mother was not dead and they still had a chance to get out. But only if her mother got to see a doctor soon. Immediately she was on her feet again to call the ambulance.

Half an hour later she was standing outside, watching the ambulance men loading her unconscious mother into the car.

They had told her not to worry, that her mothr probably only had a bad concussion and that this was the reason she was unconscious. The blood on the floor was from a bad cut on her forehead but it was not life-threatening.

"Still we have to get her to hospital ASAP. Just in case." One of the medics said. "Is your dad around?" _They don't know._

"No."_ My stepfather is not here. He did this to her. _"But I called my grandma. She's gonna be her in a few minutes." _Some lies are necessary._

"Do you think we can leave you here alone? How long will it take your grandma?"

"I'm twelve." _Please leave. _"You said nothing life-threatening happened to my mom and my grandma is surely gonna be here in no time. I'm sure we'll come right after you." She tried to sound as confident as possible.  
The medics looked at her and then at each other. It seemed that they were thinking about if they should trust the words of an twelve year old girl. But then the got into their car and drove off with her mom after telling her to which hospital they'll be going.

As soon as the ambulance had left she pulled the sheet of paper from her pocket. She knew her mom was injured but they said that she'd be fine, right? So she could try to realize her plans. She doesn't need to worry about her mother, does she?

She unfolded the sheet and read it once again. She had read it about a hundred times since she had found the adress on the internet and printed it out. She had to find this woman called Teresa McLeod. She just had to. She put the paper in her pocket again and made her way to the bus terminal where she caught the next bus to Fisher.


	2. Looking for Theresa McLeod

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything to do with McLeod's Daughters. I'm just a big fan and in my free time I'm writing a story about them. Non profit is made.

**Feedback: **Yes, please. Constructive criticism is always appreciated.

**Author's note: **I think that I've forgotten to mention that this story is a little different to the series. I also forgot to mention that Claire never existed because I have never seen any episodes with her since I only started watching McLeod's daughters in fourth season.

Maybe I should mention, too, that this (if I'm able to finish it) is gonna be a StevieAlex story.

So…I guess that's it for now.

I hope you enjoy reading and plz plz plz review!

**Chapter 2**

She arrived in Fisher in the late afternoon. She hardly had any money left, though. After she had bought the bus ticket to Fisher she had only so much money left to buy herself something to eat and a bottle of water at a petrol station there.

She was now sitting on a bench eating her sandwich and wondering if it was the right move to run and search for that woman instead of staying by her mother while she was watching the cars coming to tank up and leaving again.

She thought of her mom. About the moment she found her unconsious in the kitchen and about the lies she had told the medics.

_Is she alright? I shouldn't have left. She needs me. I odn't even have money to phone her. _

She took a sip of water from her bottle.

_I'm never gonna find this McLeod woman here in the outback! I should try to get a ride back…_

Almost at tears she started to pack the rest of her sandwich in her rucksack as she suddenly noticed it.

A white truck had stopped in front of one of the petrol pumps while she had been lost I thoughts. The truck was nothing special. Just a normal truck. She usually wouldn't have noticed it. However, the label on this very truck aroused her attention: DROVER'S RUN. T.C. MCLEOD

_McLeod! _She had to find a McLeod. This was just like an omen! _Where is the driver? _She looked around and immediately saw a tall man who was walking straight towards the truck. He seemed to just have paid for the gasoline.

"Excuse me!" She grabbed her stuff and was running towards him as he turned around curious.

" Where you just talking to me?"She looked at him nervously.

"Ähm…yes. I couldn't miss the label on your truck…" He looked at her but didn't say a word. "I…I'm looking for a woman called Theresa McLeod and…and I was wondering if you by chance…ah…know her."

He looked over his shoulder to his truck as if he didn't know what the writing on it said and then looked back to the girl. "Theresa McLeod, hu?"

She nodded.

"You're lucky. I'm her neighbour as luck would have it." He gave her a bright smile. "What do you want from her?"

" I…I…I just need to find her."

"Oookay." The man said a little disappointed because she wouldn't say more. _If she doesn't want to say more… I ain't gonna ask._

"It's about my mother." she whispered hardly to be heard. "Can you take me to her?"

Usually he didn't take stranger girls with him in his truck but this girl seemed so desperate to find Tess McLeod so he thought he could make an exception in her case. "Sure." She seemed somehow familiar as well, too. _Where have I seen her before? _he thought as they went to his truck together.

As he drove onto the street again he said: "By the way, I'm Alex Ryan. You can call me Alex, though."

She had been staring out of the window, deep in thought, but as he started to talk she turned her head to face him. She didn't smile, though. Alex thought she even seemed more desperate than before. The way she hold her rucksack close to her chest told him that she wasn't sure if she could trust him and how her journey's gonna end._ Right so, kiddo._

After a minute of awkward silence she suddenly replied: "My name is Rose. Rose Hall."


	3. Asking for help

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything to do with McLeod's Daughters. I'm just a big fan and in my free time I'm writing a story about them. Non profit is made.

**Feedback: **Yes, please. Constructive criticism is always appreciated.

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**Chapter 3**

Kate Manfredi and Jodi Fountain had just come back from driving a flock of sheep to a different pasture. They were now currying their horses, having quite a good time laughing and talking about Dave Brewer, who was the vet Kate was having a crush on but was too shy to ask him out. As they were discussing a strategy to make Dave realize Kate's feelings towards him a truck was stopping in their yard. It was one of the trucks of Drover's Run so they didn't pay any attention to it since they knew that Alex had borrowed one of them. This changed, though, as Jodi noticed a teen girl sitting on the front passenger seat.

"Hey Kate." Jodi nudged her best friend and nodded in Alex's direction. "Look!"

Kate turned around to watch in the direction Jodi suggested and got curious. "Whose the girl?"

"I don't know….wait, Alex…he is coming over."

Alex and the girl had gotten out of the car and were now walking towards them. The girl was a few steps behind him and studying her surroundings shyly.

"Kate. Jodi." Alex addressed the young women. "Have you seen Tess?"

"Yeah." They nodded absently minded as they checked out the girl. "She's inside. Doing some paper work."

"Okay." Alex suddenly seemed to be in a hurry. "Would you keep an eye on her?" He pointed at his company. "I need to talk to Tess."

He was inside the farm house before neither Kate nor Jodi could react to his request.

Now the three girls were alone, staring unsure at each other, not knowing what to say.

Jodi was the first one to break the silence. She walked over to the girl and reached for her arm. "Hi. I'm Jodi." She started to talk. "And this…" she pointed at Kate, who was still keeping her distance. "…this is Kate. She's a little shy."

Kate looked annoyed at Jodi. " I'm not. Just checking the situation and thinking before I'm talking. Which can't be said about you, Jodi." With that she walked over to them. "I'm Kate and you are…?"

"Rose."

"How come you were on the way with Alex?" Jodi wanted to know. "You aren't another illegitimate Ryan kid that no one knows of, are you?"

Rose looked confused. "No…no…" she stammered.

"Oh shut up, Jodi!" Kate yelled and looking into Rose's direction she said. "Don't listen to her. She was just trying to make a joke but she never thinks before she talks. Otherwise she would have known that you wouldn't understand it 'cause you're not from around." And in Jodi's direction. "Right, Jodi?"

Right then Alex came back with Tess, interrupting their little quarrel through their approach. "Oh see, Alex's coming back!" Jodi pointed out. The three girls turned into their direction as Alex and Tess approached.

"Rose, this is Theresa McLeod." Alex introduced his sister-in-law.

"You may call me Tess." Tess looked at the girl with the well known smile of hers. "Alex said that you are looking for me." she said as she took Rose by the hand to lead her into the house.

"Tess!" Kate yelled after her boss. "I guess you've got other things on your mind now. Shall I do your paper work?"

Tess turned around. "Thank you, Kate, but no. I'll finish it first thing in the morning. Didn't you and Jodi want to go to Gungellan with the guys?"

"Okay." Kate replied. "See you tomorrow, then." With that Kate and Jodi turned back to their horses.

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In the living room Tess was serving tea. Alex, who had offered to stay until they knew what's up with the kid, was helping her. After Tess had also brougth a piece of cake to both Alex and Rose she settled down opposite of Rose and watched her eat. _The girl's surley gonna start talking by herself, _she thought and was not disappointed. As soon as Rose had finished her piece of cake she started to talk.

"I came here from Adelaide. I was looking for you because my mom always talked about you. She used to tell stories about you and the farm she grew up on and how much fun you used to have and how good friends you were-"

Tess looked at the girl confused. She didn't know who she was talking about. "I…I'm sorry. I don't even know your whole name let alone you're mother's name." she interrupted the girl as cautious as possible.

The girl looked a little disappointed at Tess. "Hall. My name is Rose Hall." Tess eyes grew wide. "As in Stevie Hall?"

_Stevie? _The girl nodded. "She's my mom."

"I see." Tess nodded. "And where is your mom now?"

"She's in hospital. They took her there this very morning." She was almost at tears now.

"Hey, it's okay." Alex who hadn't said a word the last few minutes got up from his chair to pull Rose in a comforting embrace. "Shhhh…."

Tess was stunned. She didn't exactly expect Alex Ryan to do such a thing. This was more like Tess's thing. Pulling others in comforting embraces. She didn't say anything to him, though. She didn't even give him a strange look as he usually gave her. He wouldn't have noticed anyway.

"It's okay, Rose." Tess reasured her. "Tell us. Why is your mother in hospital?"

Rose hesitated. Could she really trust them? Should she tell them? Her mom wouldn't be pleased. _But that's what I've come here for!_ "My stepfather." She stated.

Tess looked at Alex in shock, who met her glance, and then looked back at the girl sitting in front of her. "Your stepfather? You mean…" She waited for Rose to confirm her suspicion.

"He beat her unconscious this morning." Rose was now crying heart-rending.

"Here." Tess reached her a hankie.

After some time Rose calmed down and stopped crying again. She freed herself from Alex's embrace, even tough she was thankful for his gesture of comfort. She actually liked it. She had never had a dad to comfort her…

"He…he has been beating her up since I can remember, but he had never knocked her unconsious before."

"Is your mom okay?" Tess asked and Alex could hear concern in her voice.

"When they took her to hospital the medics said that she had a bad concussion. And she had a bad cut on her forehead, but there was so much blood on the floor…so much blood." Alex thought she'd start crying again but she didn't and so he asked the next question that had come to his mind.

"Where is your father?"

Rose just shrugged her shoulders.

"I see." Tess said. "And you have come out here all by yourself?"

"I've been planning it for a few months now. I found your adress on the internet. Mom always talked about you and this farmstead and how much she liked it here and….and ….and I thought that you probably might help us."

Tess looked at Alex in astonishment, who returned the same kind of look. They had expected something totally different. They certainly hadn't expected the daughter of a long lost childhood friend to appear at their doorstep asking for help.

"Mum would never come by herself and ask for help." Rose continued, not noticing their amazement. "She is too scared that he might hurt me, too. She is staying because of me, but I can't stand it any longer. I can't stand her getting hurt for me. So I came here. To stop it."

"Well…" Tess started not knowing what else to say.

"Please." The girl was looking at her with pleading eyes.

"Okay." Alex suddenly said. "You look like you need a shower. You'll go and take one and then we'll call the hospital."

"Yeah. That's what we're gonna do." Tess got up to show Rose the way to the bathroom, grateful to Alex Ryan for buying them a little more time to think about things. "Come on."

Before the two girls had left the room Alex got up, too. "You've got guts, young lady. Coming out here all by yourself.", he said winking to her. "I'm sure we can think of something to help you."

Rose faced him with a tormented smile. "Thank you."

"Now go. Take a shower."


	4. Bittersweet memories

**Chapter 4: Bittersweet memories**

_My name is Rose Hall.-As in Stevie Hall?-She is my mom._

Tess' and Rose's words wouldn't leave his thoughts. They kept repeating in his mind again and again as he was staring out of the kitchen window. He couldn't believe that after all those years he got a message from her. Well, not really from her but from her daughter. He hadn't expected to ever hear from her again. In fact there had been times long ago when he didn't want to have anything to do with her never again.

First he was desperatly waiting for her to call him and after some time he got furious with her because she didn't. He then started to put up with the fact that he was never gonna hear from her again, that she was gone for good. But he had never stopped thinking about her, though.  
From time to time he would be wondering where she would be living then. She surely would have a family by then. Kids playing in her garden. A loving husband. He often thought about how she would have looked. If she still had those red curls framing her laughing face. If her eyes were still full of passion and joy.  
He would never have imagined that she was a batterd wife at the age of… _wait I'm 29. She then has to be 27… _He actually would never have pictured her life that way. And he never would have thought that she had a 12 year old who would go hitchhiking all by herself.

"Did you ever think that we might get news from her someday?" Tess interrupted his thoughts.  
"I used to believe a long time ago." Alex sighed. He seemed to be captured in his own world, but after a short moment he asked "Is she sleeping at last?" refering to Rose.

Tess nodded. "It's been a very upsetting day for her. For all of us."  
Then there was silence again which was interrupted soon, though.

"Hey! Anybody home?" Tess' husband Nick entered the room and immediately went over to his wife to kiss her hello as he always did. He stopped in his movement, though, as he sensed that something was definitly not right. "What's wrong, darlin'?" She looked at him with disbelief in her eyes.  
"We've got news from Stevie today."

"Stevie Hall?" Nick couldn't really believe in what he had just heard.  
"Well, we didn't talk to her personally. But her daughter visited us today. Rose. Cute girl. She is sleeping upstairs in one of the guest rooms."

"Her daughter? Really?" He was stunned.  
Tess nodded. "What did the girl say about Stevie?" Nick asked impatiently wouldn't go on talking. He wanted to know how Stevie was doing. After all she had been like a sister to him when they grew up together, Stevie, Alex, Tess and himself. The four of them used to spend every free minute of their time together. Until Stevie had suddenly and without saying a word left Drover's shortly after her fifteenth birthday. He thought, well, he hoped she'd be doing great living somewhere abroad and that that would have been the reason that she never called but what Alex then told him was a total shock to him.

"The girl said that her stepfather is beating the life out of Stevie Hall." his brother announced calmly. The furious glance in his eyes gave the lie to his coolness, though, and Nick knew that it was just an attempt to try not to lose his composure.

"She came here looking for me to ask for help-" Tess told her husband. "-because Stevie was taken to hospital this morning. Her husband beat her unconsious."

"Unconsious?" Nick asked in disbelief and then in concern "Is she alright?"

Tess nodded. "Under those circumstances. She needed a few stiches on her forehead and she got a mild concussion. She'll need crutches for some time, because she also has a sprained ankle. The doc said she could leave for home in a few days, tough."

"Okay." Nick nodded relieved. "What about the girl? How did she come here?"

"She took the bus from Adelaide to Fisher. She was thinking of hitchhiking, can you believe that? But as luck would have it Alex picked her up at the petrol station there."

"Hitchhiking?" _Well, necessity is the mother of invention, but still…_ "The girl can't be that old to have such a bad idea. How old is she? Six? Maybe Seven?"

"She's twelve." Alex stated wondering what his brother was talking about.

"Twelve?" Nick asked incredulous. "That's ridiculous. Stevie must have had her when she was 15." He said aloud what the two others hadn't even realized yet.

"That was when she left Drover's." Tess threw in and then it came to her mind as a brainwave. "Maybe that's why she left. Because she was pregnant."

Alex looked at her bewildered as if she just had announced that Jesus himself was coming to dinner. _O my god!_

"Do you think so?" Nick asked his wife. "Then who is the father? It has to be someone from around here, if it is true what you are suggesting. Speaking only for my part I have never caught Stevie having a boyfriend, though, have you?"

Tess shook her head.

_She was pregnant. _Alex thought and an idea was forming in his mind. _She had a baby when she still was a half a child herself._

"Alex?" Nick's voice interrupted his thoughts. He looked at his brother and then at his sister-in-law.

"Sorry. Gotta go.", was all he said as he stormed out of the house leaving a perplexed Nick and Tess behind.


	5. Welcome home

**Chapter 5: Welcome home**

Rose had been living at Drover's Run for three days now and got settled in in no time. She'd been helping at the farm whenever possible and since she had been able to get riding lessons in return for a little farm work at a stud in Adelaide she was even able to help moving the cattle. She had easily made friends with Tess and Nick and also with their farm hands Jodi and Kate and although getting up at 5am was hard Rose had liked it there from the first moment on and she was so glad that her mom had agreed to let her stay.

Stevie was not very pleased when she heard first that Rose was staying at Drovers but she soon saw that it was the only choice she had. She couldn't send her daughter back to a home where she was in danger of getting hurt. She actually didn't want to go back there, either, so when Tess and Nick showed up at the hospital to get her she took the opportunity to go back to the place she had wanted to go since she had left: back to Drover's Run.

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It was in the late afternoon when the three of them had gotten back from Adelaide. Nick was unloading the car. Stevie had insisted on grabbing some of her and Rose's stuff as long as James was at work.  
While Nick was unloading their stuff, Tess showed Stevie around a little.

"There hasn't changed much in the past years." Stevie said.

"No, it hasn't." Tess agreed. "We can't afford, unfortunately."

"Well, I'm glad it hasn't." Stevie said. "I always loved what it looked like." Tess noticed the tears welling up in Stevie's eyes but before she could say or do anything her friend got a grip on herself again. "Where is Rose?" she asked, trying not to show any weakness.

"She is over at Kilarney helping my farm hands and Alex with the sheep. Their flock broke through the fence and now they need to be sorted out. You remember Alex?"

"Alex? Of course I do." _Alex Ryan. I remember him very well. I wonder if he has changed at all._

"Good. Because he and his two roommates are coming over for dinner. We are celebrating Rose's first time to drive the cattle."

"Really?" _Alex Ryan is coming over for dinner? _Stevies expression changed from a somewhat happy one to pure terror. Tess noticed this change immediately.

She wouldn't be herself if she didn't. "What's wrong?" She grabbed her friend's shoulder softly, wanting to help her. "Stevie?" But before she could get an answer they were interrupted by Rose who was running towards them, laughing and screaming with joy. "Mom!"

Stevie let her crutches fall down to hug her daughter. "Rose!" She placed a kiss on her hair. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine, mom."

"Really?" She held her daughter tight and didn't seem to want let go of her any time soon.

"Mom….mom! You're choking me."

Stevie let go of her daughter. "I'm sorry, darlin'. It's just…I'm so glad you're okay." She placed another kiss on Rose's hair and took her hand. "Let's go inside. Tess told me they were givin' a party for you."

"Yes, they are! Because I helped moving the cattle. Oh mom, moving the cattle was so great and today helping Jodi and Kate with the sheep….and Alex…you have to meet Alex…" Listening to Rose's babble the three women went back to the house not aware of Alex, who had watched the scene thoughtfully.

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After they went back in Tess had shown Stevie around the house while Nick and Rose prepared the second guest room for Stevie. Afterwards they all got ready for dinner.

At present they were all settled around the dining table waiting for the food to arrive. Since Tess was in Adelaide to pick up Stevie and Jodi and Kate had to do all the farm work and therefore had no time to prepare dinner Dave had agreed to do the cooking. Because he had all the supplies at home he decided to cook there and then would bring it over with the help of Rob and Alex, who were also condemned to help him. Naturally enough the three guys were late, but what else was to expect on such a special evening. The food just had to arrive late.

Jodi and Kate were telling the others now about how much talent Rose got for farmwork and Rose declared how much fun she had had so far helping them.  
Stevie tried to show interest in the conversation but it was hard for her. She was too nervous because she didn't know what to expect from this evening. She didn't know most of the people and the ones she knew she hadn't talked to in years. Twelve years ago they had shared their last words. She had left them without saying goodbye…

Her thoughts drifted off to a time long ago and she wasn't listening to her daughter anymore but before anybody could notice a door slamming shut was heard.  
Seconds later two handsome men entered the dining room carrying dishes which seemed to be full of food and whose contents were spreading a delicious smell all over the room. "Good evening ladies! Nick. Already waiting for the chef's special, ain't?" A smirk appeared on the blonde's face as he placed the dishes on the talbe.  
"Hi, Dave!" Kate exclaimed with an bright smile on her face.

"Kate has a crush on Dave." Rose whispered with her know-it-all-voice as she leaned over to her mother to explain. "That's why she is acting so weird when he is around. Isn't she funny? But he doesn't notice at all." Stevie smiled and poked her daughter teasingly but couldn't reply anything, because Tess had started the introduction. "Stevie, this is Dave Brewer." She pointed at the blonde guy who was now shaking hands with the red head. "He is the vet of this area and I don't think you've ever met a guy that can cook as well as Dave does."  
"Never?" Stevie looked at him examining.  
"Sorry to delay dinner. Had to help a wombat that was hit by a car. Hope you're hungry, though. I made a Dave Brewer speciality especially for Tess' guests."

"Well, that's Dave." Kate said. "Always helping the helpless."

Stevie nodded quickly. Gosh, she was really hungry!

"Oh and that is Rob Shelton." Tess pointed at the younger, black haired man. "He is the new overseer at Kilarney since Alex has been running the business."

"Hi" and a handshake was all Stevie got from him, which she was grateful for because she didn't feel like answering any 'how-are you'-questions or return witty comments.  
"He's not talking very much." Jodi adressed Stevie. "He is all mystery man and …Hey, Dave! Where is Alex by the way?"

Dave, who was preparing the main course, looked up. "Oh right." He turned in Tess' direction. "Alex kindly asked me to say thanks for your invitation but something's cropped up. He wouldn't go into details butah…" He turned to Stevie. "He sends his best regards to you."

Stevie didn't know what to say. She didn't know if she was relieved or not that Alex Ryan wasn't showing up. She knew it was because of her but she couldn't blame him for not wanting to see her. To much had happened in the past. However, she knew that she would have to face him eventually. She just hoped he'd understand her then. Maybe it was better for all of them that the both of them wouldn't exchange their first words in twelve years in a room full of people they both loved.

Somewhat relieved he hadn't shown up she turned to her daughter who had just expressed her disappointment. " I wanted you to meet him, mom. He is so cool."  
"I'm sorry darlin'. You could introduce us tomorrow nevertheless." _Yeah, tomorrow's soon enough._

"Let's propose a toast to Rose and her mother. " Stevie suddenly could hear Dave say and mother and daughter interrupted their conversation to face the handsome vet. "To welcome them properly at Drover's."

All the others raised their glasses as well and with that they welcomed Stevie Hall and her daughter Rose.

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I know this chapter didn't turn out very well. I still hope you kinda like it. 


	6. chapter6

Dinner was really great. Rose was having fun and even the food was good. Stevie had forgotten what it was called, though. She hadn't been really listening when Dave had told them. It had been some secret recipe of his mama's if she could recall it correctly.

Stevie hadn't meant to be impolite and not being listening. She really tried hard but she just couldn't focus on what the others said. Her thoughts drifted off to different times, to different things.

She had her mind on things that had happened a long time ago when she still was a child and on things that just had happened a few days ago.

She was remembering the things that had happened that very morning in her home in Adelaide. She couldn't remember what she had said to her husband, what had made him flow into a rage. It wasn't important anyway, he'd beat her up whenever he felt like it and she couldn't do anything about it.

She kept thinking about when she had woken from unconsciousness. When she first hadn't known where she had been; when she had finally asked the nurse who was checking on her if her daughter was outside in the hallway.

"Daughter? There was no daughter with you."

Those words had felt like a knife through her heart. She could still feel the fear take hold of her when she remembered them. The fear that something could have happened to Rose. The fear that HE could have hurt her, too.

She could have never forgiven herself if that had been a fact.

The memory of what had happened afterwards was blurred. Panic had overcome her. Rose couldn't be hurt! She remembered vaguely calling Rose's friends. Hearing them say that they had no idea about Rose's whereabouts.

And then she had been talking to the police. Her throat getting tighter and tighter with every word she had told them about James. About Rose. The tears welling up in her eyes.

She hadn't heard the phone ring.

Well, if she thought about it now she remembered a phone ringing, but she hadn't paid any attention to it. Who'd have been calling her anyway? James wouldn't have and she was sure that Rose had been hurt, otherwise she'd would have been there. With her.

The nurse must have picked up then as she had reached her the receiver.

She couldn't remember taking it. She couldn't remember leading it to her ear. She couldn't remember answering it. All she could remember was relief washing over her body when she heard Rose's voice. The tears she had been trying to hold back had been runnng freely down her face. Only difference was that those had now been tears of joy. Not the tears of fear.

"Are you okay?" she had managed to bring out between her sobs. _God, she just has to be_.

She had looked at the two officers who were watching her interrogative. She had nodded and smiled at them, wiping away the tears that had wetted her cheeks, while she had heard Rose telling her that everything was fine. That she was not with James. That she was at a friend's.

Stevie had heard herself asking Rose to hold on and then telling the police that everything was fine, that Rose was staying with a friend of hers. They then had excused themselves, relieved that the child had turned up safe, giving the young redhead some privacy.

Turning her attention back to Rose she had realized she still hadn't known where exactly her daughter had been. The girl had many friends.

"Rose, where are you? I was worried about you!"

She had tried not to sound reproachful but she couldn't ban it totally from her voice.

"I'm sorry, mum! I didn't mean to upset you."

She had immediately regretted her undertone. Of course Rose wouldn't upset her on purpose. She had to have good reasons for that.

"It's okay, hon. I'm sorry. Just tell me where you're at and if you can stay there for two or three days. I'll be home by then."

"You have to promise me first that you won't freak out, mum." she had heard her daughter demand over the phone.

"Why would I do that?"

"Promise me!" Stevie had let out a deep sigh. Seriously, why should she freak out when her daughter was safe?

"I'm at Drover's Run…" she heard her daughter say timidly.

"Excuse me?" She couldn't believe what she'd just had heard. Had her daughter really said Drover's Run? No, she must have misheard. How would she have gotten there anyway? And most importantly, why would she have gone there? She didn't even know the people there. She had not even known herself if the farmstead still belonged to the McLeod family.

"I…I'm at Drover's Run." she had heard her daughter repeat. "And Mrs. Mcleod said…" Rose's attention seemed to have been drawn to something else, because all that Stevie could here was a rustle. Before she could have said anything Rose had been back with her, though.

"…uhm…Tess said I can stay here until you're better."

"Tess?" _I haven't talked to Tess in years. I wonder how she is…I guess she was just as surprised by Roses turn up as I am with the fact she's there. Oh god, I guess she knows now why I left Drover's…I didn't want her to find out that way…_

"Mum?" Rose's voice had snapped her back to reality. "Are you still there?"

"Uhm..yeah…I'm…uhm…I'm here…" She had tried to compose herself. "How did you get there?" She then demanded to know.

"I don't think you wanna know…"

"Rose, I am your mother, I want to know how you got there." _Oh my god, what did she do?_

"I took the bus to Fisher and then…." she had hesitated a moment "then I went hitchhiking because I didn't have any money left."

"You did WHAT?" This was really bad. How could she have been so stupid to do such a thing? "How many times have I told you that you ar…."

"Mum, please calm down! Nothing happened. Really. I was picked up by Alex Ryan. He said he knows you…"

_Alex Ryan?_ Stevie had almost choked on her own breath. However, before she could have asked any questions Rose had added. "Mum, I better get going. Tess says you need to rest. I'll call you tomorrow."

"Okay. Tess is probably right." Stevie had let out a heavy sigh. The whole occurrence of that day had in fact drained most of her energy from her body. "I love you, Rose."

"I love you, too, mum! You'll be here soon, won't you?" The concern in her daughter's voice had almost broken her heart. "Don't worry, sweety. I'll be with you soon."

"Good." She had heard Rose sigh relieved. "Night, mum."


	7. Revelations

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything to do with McLeod's Daughters. I'm just a big fan and in my free time I'm writing a story about them. Non profit is made.

**Feedback: **Yes, please. I love reviews! Wanna know what you guys think!

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**Chapter 7: Revelations**

Later that night Stevie was sitting on the veranda. She needed some time alone. Inside Tess, Nick, Dave, Kate, Jodi and Rob and playing some quiz game with Rose.

As Stevie sat there she was listening to their joyful laughter. _Rose has never been this happy before _she thought as she watched the moon shining down on Drover's Run. _Maybe it was the right thing to let Tess talk me into coming here._

Aside from a rustle that was heard now and then and was probaly caused by a mouse or something similar and the chirping of some nocturnal birds, it was totally quiet. Sometimes she could also hear the sheep bleating in the distance. So it was quite a puzzle that she didn't notice Alex Ryan approaching her until he stepped up the veranda.

"Hi, Steves!" he said with a somewhat awkward expression on his face. She couldn't tell what it meant, though.

"Hi….hi!" Stevie stuttered surprised. She hadn't heard him coming and he had caught her totally off guard.

"You look good." Alex stated.

"I…uhm…" she had been preparing for what she'd say to him when she'd meet him again but everything she had been thinking was gone now. Her mind was totally empty, she was lost for words.

"Utterly speechless, I see." He seated himself next to her and started to watch the moon. "It was kinda the same with me when I learned that I picked up our daughter while she was hitchhiking."

She looked at him, eyes wide with astonishment. _He knew? _She meant to say something like ….She didn't know what she should tell him, so she just kept her mouth shut.

"Where you ever planning on telling me that we have a daughter?" He seemed to be totally calm but in his voice Stevie could hear an undertone which told her that Alex was everything else but calm.

Stevie could look Alex no longer in the eyes. She felt ashamed and tears were welling up in her eyes. She shook her head slightly. _No, she had never intended to tell him. _

She could sense him tighten up. "Why not?" he yelled as he flew into a rage. "Why didn't you tell me you were pregnant? I would have been there for you. Instead you left without a word and I only found out that I have a daughter because I accidently happen to pick her up at a petrol station." As rapid as his outburst came it also went. He calmed down and started to watch the moon again.

Stevie didn't know what to do. She knew that it hadn't been fair to keep him away from his child. He had every right to be mad. _But I did what I thought was right then. _She kept telling herself this as she tried to control her feelings but she soon lost her composure. "I'm sorry, Alex." She dissolved into tears. "I'm so sorry." _I really am._

She reached for his arm and he pulled her in an embrace because he couldn't see her cry. He couldn't be angry with her anymore, either. "Shhhh….it's okay, Steves." He placed a gentle kiss on her hair while Stevie settled her head against his chest sobbing quietly, feeling safe for the first time in twelve years.

After Stevie had stopped crying Alex had suggested they go for a walk since they couldn't meet the others inside as long as Stevie looked as if she had been crying non-stop for a week. And because he had wanted to talk to her somewhere, where the risk of getting interrupted was lower. She had agreed to come with him because she also knew that they needed to talk and it wouldn't be any good to put off with it any longer. She had waited already too long. With Stevie needing her crutches they couldn't walk very far though so they pretty much just walked around the yard.

"So…does she know about me?" Alex asked.

Stevie shook her head. "No. She knows that her father is someone I've loved once, but I never told her your name."

"I see." She could hear the disappointment in his voice and she knew she had to explain. "It's not that I've never wanted to. It's just…It would have been too … too.." She was searching for the right words to explain. "I was tryin' to forget you."

_Forget me? Well, that was clear. _"I see." They walked on in silence. Neither of them wanted to make the first move to break it again. But Alex soon got tired of waiting for her to start. He grabbed her arm and urged her to stop. She sensed that he was going to ask a question that she didn't want to answer so she didn't look at him even though her body faced his. "Why did you leave, Stevie?" She didn't give him an answer, instead she faced the night sky. He sensed that this was a touchy subject to her but still he needed to know. He had a right to know. He gently put a hand up to her chin and forced her to look at him. "Why? Why didn't you trust me?"

_We got a problem, Harry._

_I know, mate. You're daughter's screwing my son. _

_She's pregnant.-_

_WHAT?!_

_She's told her mother this morning._

_Okay, okay. Lemme think……_

_Harry-_

_I want you to end this! I want her out of the way. My son's gonna merry a decent girl and not this….this…bitch 'cause she's pregnant._

_Harry, I don'…_

_How much do you want? I'll give you enough to find her a husband._

_I think we should… _

_I will not allow this girl to destroy Alex' future! This baby could be anybody's and so taken all in all I'm very generous to you. Find her a husband. I'll pay what it takes._

"Alex…I don't wan.."

"I have a right to know, Stevie. You owe me that much." She saw he was hurt and in her heart she knew he was right, but she didn't want to tell him.

"Alex." He didn't face her. "Alex, look at me." He didn't respond at first but then he turned towards her. She took both his hands in hers as she looked him straight in the eyes. "I trusted you, Alex Ryan." Her expression told him she was telling the truth. "I loved you, but…"

"But what?"

_He can't know everything._ "I still was a child, Alex. A child with a child."

"I would have looked after you." She looked at him as if he was fooling himself.

"You were half a child yourself, Alex."

"I was seventeen."

"I know."

"We could have tried." She saw the hurt in his eyes but also the tinniest hint of acknowledgement that she had been right.

She smiled at him sadly. "We both know it wouldn't have worked out." He took her in a

tight embrace, letting out a heavy sigh. And so they stood there watching the night sky

until they could hear Rose howl with pleasure because she won the game.

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